The Ugly American is alive and well in the Philippines :(

My fellow expat from Missouri,
It was very nice being able to share the evening with you the other night at Mia’s.  I had heard from many other expats in Dumaguete that Mia’s (just north of the airport) was a nice spot to get some good food, and truth be told, they were absolutely right.  The fish and chips was totally dee-lish (and massively portioned) and the flambe mango and ice cream was to die for.  You were sitting at the table next to us with your wife and another couple.    I am not sure it was just because you extroverted or if your hearing aid battery was low, but it was most considerate that you included us in your conversation.  Sometimes it’s a bit lonely being a foreigner in this strange land, and it was pretty selfless of you to include us in your audience.  Thanks for letting us know that the police in this country are completely inept and thoroughly corrupt and do nothing more than ride around in the back of raggedy police multicabs and show off their automatic weapons.  Your discourse on most of the population living in decrepit huts and running around half naked was also  a welcome addition to our dinner menu.  I wasn’t aware of this, but my girl assured me later that in some areas of the country it was true.  We also applaud your extended one-way deliberation on how terrible the food is here and how you absolutely refuse to eat in a place that has a dirt floor.  Here-here!  Letting me know just how dirt, rat and cockroach infested these “eateries” are really added a special something to our evening.  And my awareness of this country rose exponentially when you went on your diatribe about how horribly benighted these heathen savages are.  Your description of the ignorance of the local population was both extensive and thoroughly detailed, and I salute the energy you expended in sharing your evaluation of it.  Your dinner companions were very quiet, and I can only assume they – like us – were focused on just absorbing the wisdom being conferred through your rather fevered edification.  I almost – ALMOST – asked to take your photo for my blog.  I had recently documented the pleasant time I had spent in my first six months here in the Philippines and during the course of it, I was hard pressed to find many negatives.  Thanks to you, I finally realized (I’m kinda slow on the uptake, ya know?) what I liked least about the country.  I got a good chuckle out of that, and my smile only grew as you continued to pound on the table bell to summon another round of drinks, all the while complaining about the horrible customer service. 
Thanks man.
 
It’s thoroughly appreciated.

🙂

Comments 8

  1. I truly wish (though I doubt it could ever come true) that the gentleman of whom you wrote could read and identify himself! Unfortunately there are so many more just like this wonderful educator as yours!

  2. Yeah, the complaining can get a little old after a while. I can understand having to vent every now and then, but this was neither the right place or time. Still, the fish and chips was pretty damn good. 🙂

  3. I always wonder about these kinda guys and why they actually stay in a place that they clearly don’t like very well plus the dirt floors rats and cockroaches add flavor to the dishes served.

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      Come to find out, everyone who has been in Dumaguete for a while actually knows that guy. He’s a fixture at Mia’s and just complains and complains and complains…..

      If a guy comes here JUST for the women and doesn’t have the temperament needed to fully appreciate all that the country has to offer, he is gonna be miserable. IMHO.

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  4. I’s bet good money the guy’d be complaining just as loud if he were back in the States. Some people just complain. Would complain if he won a $100 million powerball lottery – that he should have won $200 million.

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